Two Little Men In a Flying Saucer

This story starts many years ago when I was a little boy, sadly my parents had divorced and my father who had custody of us children was struggling to cope with a full-time job as well as looking after us. In the end what he decided to do was reluctantly put us all in care, so off we went to what I now think was a reception centre, that I vaguely remember was full of adults and children all in one great big room.

People talk about false memory, but the one thing I remembered about the place was a song that kept being played the title which is “Two little Men In A Flying Saucer” which was a catchy little song, but seemed to be totally unrelated to anything going on in the place.

Years passed and I never heard the song again, although occasionally it would pop into my head and as time went on I could become quite boring on the subject, I was tempted to contact the BBC, because the memory of the record never went away and it would have helped if only they could have confirmed that the song existed.

Well now it's 50 years and more since that experience and the song was still niggling at the back of my mind, so now having some computer experience, and within my limitations an ability to search the Internet, at long last I googled it, guess what there it was I wasn't dreaming, even more interestingly it was for sale at Amazon, so I quickly went to their site, found the link to play as short piece of the song and there it was just as I remembered, I finally discovered that it had been sung by Ella Fitzgerald.

Straightaway I ordered the CD that had the song on, uncertain because it was coming from America whether or not it would be a good copy or even arrive, but good old Amazon, I received an e-mail from the company confirming delivery.

Finally the day came and a small package arrived so I rushed to my CD player and tried it out, there it was the funny little song from all those years ago, and quite catchy as well.

Well is there a moral in this story, firstly if we remember something, carry on believing that it was true, don't waste time go out and prove you were right, and finally its strange in life that something so unhappy is going into care can have such a lovely link, if I could work out how to put the music somewhere that you could find it I would do, maybe some bright intelligent person will tell me how I can put it on my other blog.

Just in case I have tempted you, sadly Amazon no longer have the record listed, if people really wanted to hear it maybe I will be encouraged to put it on the blog, I hope you enjoyed the read

Two Little Ducks

Well this is the story of too little ducklings and the adventures they had in their time they shared our home.

It all started one day whilst walking Katie our dog, suddenly there was a large sound of quacking on the route to the fields, looking over the fence there was their family duck accompanied by a group of tiny chicks.

We said to the owner how cute we felt they are all were, his response was to offer us one because sadly he wasn't able to keep them all, our response was to say yes please, but that unfortunately we were going on holiday that day, he was quite happy to keep it until our return.

After the holiday we went round to have a look at our duck, also we had thought it would be nice if we could have two, well what a surprise all the ducklings had grown very rapidly in the short period, but also we were told there was no problem with us having two ducks.

While the next task was to rapidly create somewhere for them to live, plus a run to protect them from any other animals, this was done so we went to collect the ducks that were both males, we named them Gilbert & Sullivan (not very original).

A neighbour provided a pool for them to go in although they always preferred their water dish to flap about in & they gave a lot of pleasure to us and the neighbours over the next month or two, they also enjoyed watching me chasing them round the garden as they continued to grow in the evening when I was trying to get them in the run at night.

The only problem was that in their search for worms they ate a lot of soil which then came out the other end, smelling rather strongly, so we moved their home & run onto the concrete.

We had always said we would not clip their wings so that if ever they wanted to leave home they could, they had also educated us to their needs, by tapping at the back door with their beaks if we were late feeding them.

Well one morning whilst chasing them to pen them up, one actually managed to flap its wings sufficiently to get into the front garden, well as I chased it, now it had a good line of sight, on the next flap, up into the air we went, out of sight.

I spent some time searching & eventually found the errant duck, and pounced, well I was to late off into the air & across the gardens it went out of sight. So I returned deflated, hoping that when the duck became hungry it would return home.

Sadly after a week it still had not come back and the remaining duck was becoming more dejected by the day, so finally we felt it was better to give it its freedom and to take it down to the local lodges in the hope that being with the other ducks there it would settle in.

Off we went to carry out the task, well would the duck leave, no until finally I coxed it out & off into the water it went. A local fisherman said what a coincidence, only the other day, a couple had come with a duck that had arrived at their house and would not leave. At first it had been a novelty, but they got fed up with its constant tapping at the back door.

A happy ending at long last the two duck could get back together and exchange their adventures over the last week and get to meet the new friends down there

Katie Jane My Doggy Friend

Well we first came to meet Katie we were on a trip to Birmingham, to visit relatives, it was mentioned that there was a young dog called Fluff, a female cross border collie, who if she was not found a home soon, would be going to the dogs home where if she was not homed, she would be put to sleep.

We went to look at the dog, who was a rather odd looking sort of dog, with the head of an Alsatian, and the body of a collie, she looked very frightened and anxious but at the same time affectionate.

How could we have not taken her, but here was the problem, how to get back home to Manchester with her, because at that time we did not have a car, and had in fact travelled down by train, well we found a lead somewhere, and off we went to the station, where the first surprise was we had to buy her a ticket.

The trip up to Manchester was uneventful, and on the way home we bought a new collar and lead, as well as dishes for water and food, not forgetting the food itself. When we got home, we showed her around the house and got her settled for the night.

We quickly decided that fluff was the wrong name for her and for reasons I can't now remember we changed her name to Katie, the next task was to go and see the vet, which we did quite quickly, he said rather than the young puppy we thought she was, she was actually 18 months old, but in good general health, he did her injections and off we went.

One of the problems we discovered with her, was that she was frightened of men, although she seemed to have no problem with me, but that might have been to do with the walks I took her on, one of the things she never ever came to terms with, was being in the car when the windscreen wipers were on, after a time we realised that this was because she identified the wipers as a stick coming down on her, which would be consistent with her having been beaten in the past.

I found she was a lovely companion, and when I wanted time on my own I used to take around the fields and I would chat to her as my best friend, during these times I taught her to retrieve objects in particular her lead, which she would happily chase them bring back to me, with her ears up, foolishly waiting for me to do it the next time.

One day whilst we were out with her, I threw a stick as I had many other times, but sadly on this occasion she pounced on the stick, but it had landed upright in the soft earth, and because of the speed, it went down her throat, we rushed to her because she was in so much pain and took her straight away to see the vet, fortunately she had not done too much damage and was quickly back to her old self.

As a result we learned never to do that again and instead bought her rubber ring which was bright orange so that we could see it if it was dropped, or lost any time.

One year we took her down to the lodges and I threw her ring a little too far and it went in the water, sadly it could not be found so we had to buy a new one, the following year there was little rain and one day when we went down to the lodges lower and behold there was the ring which we quickly retrieved, cleaned up and continue to use for her pleasure.

She was a lovely dog who was kind affectionate and very loving, she was also bright and intelligent and quick to learn and generally just happy to be in our company, having said that, she did have some strange traits, in that although she was a female dog, on occasion she would attempt to mount the cat, which we could never ever understand.

Sadly over a period of time her health deteriorated and one day she seemed to lose control of her legs so again we took her to the vet, but this time there was nothing could be done, we therefore asked that he put her to sleep so she would not be in pain or distress. She is still missed even now.

Computer Dating in The 70s

Well I have talked about this subject for years to a very small audience & if nothing else apart from boredom, my adventures in computer dating in the 70s should at least make you smile.

I was getting over a relationship that had gone terribly wrong , but I still thought that there must be some nice people out there if only there was a way to find them.

I had problems due to being shy, not good at pubs, sports or other activities that normally would create the chance to meet people, in fact I was working 12 hours a day in a signal box from 11am to 11pm, so my chances were practically nil of meeting others.

So I read an article about computer dating which matched people up with similar needs, this seemed perfect & how could a clever computer get it more wrong than I had.

So I sent off my money & application form & got a printout of six people, I eagerly rang the first, to be told she had found someone already.

The next sounded nice, so we arranged to meet, the next question was where & how would we recognise each other, well she said she would have a blue trousers suit on which sounded quite promising, then said it matched her MG sports car, well at the time I had a little Honda moped, but never mind hey.

Well we met she was smaller than me but not a problem, so we went for a drink & a chat, she mentioned the horses at home & sadly a picture of what would happen next came to mind but I felt be positive, well we had a nice chat and either as a nice put down or the truth she then proceeded to announce she had tried this to get over her last partner but really felt she was not ready for the next relationship yet.

Well back to the station said goodbyes, never heard again, would it of worked not sure, her horse my moped maybe not.

Undaunted, I thought well at least she seemed nice lets try another, so rang, again a number of times & finally spoke to someone, again pleasant voice arranged to meet under the clock at Piccadilly Station at 8pm, she would be wearing a Pink coat, I would be wearing my trusty blue suit again. Well I waited & waited approached a couple of girls who seemed to fit the bill none of them, so started thinking been stood up. Finally just as I was thinking it was all in vain, I saw her & we introduced ourselves.

Well we decided to go to a local pub for a drink & the conversation flowed nicely until I asked what had delayed her. She explained she had been working late, so I asked what she did. I could not follow what she said so asked again, she explained she worked in A SIGNALBOX!!!! I said what as so she explained that she operated the levers to help the trains proceed, well I could not believe it, what a computer it must be, I wasted no time and explained I did the same job, guess her response,

She said I joined this to get away from Railway men.

Well I thought here we go again nice to of met & start again, but no we started chatting about all sorts of things not the railway.
To cut a long story short we became very good friends we never moved into a formal relationship but used to chat when at work & exchange stories of others we had met on the way. I am not sure how we stopped chatting but one day I realised a couple of years had passed & we had not rung each other.

If you are out there & ever read this let me know Sylvia, I would love to know did you ever meet the love of your life & if so what happened.

Well readers that’s all for now I will come back soon & tell you more of how computer dating & others affected my life

A Tale of Bonsall the Spitting Cat

Some years ago after our last cat Ollie had died, we had an offer of a replacement cat 3 years old, who had belonged to an elderly lady, who had sadly died.

The cat had been left in the home, fed but isolated for 1 month and now a new caring home was sought, were we interested, the cat was named Bonsall by the previous owner.

We went to meet the cat, and found it to be the largest female black cat we had ever seen, plus it was also not the caring loving type as we had come to know, its favourite response appeared to be spit very loudly at anything it did not like, which always included us when we tried to make it do anything other than lie on its favourite chair in our lounge.

Well how could we not take on the challenge & surely in not to long a time it would grow to love us and be lots of fun.

Sadly for most of the time Bonny as she came to be known as did her own thing, perched on the chair she had adopted as her own in the lounge, she did not mix with us or the other pets, apart from when I went out to take the dog Katie for her daily walks.

She would then come out with us but was unwilling to actually walk with us rather she would creep along behind the hedges until they finished then quickly rush out to the next hedge.

If any other animal or person came across her she would give a long loud spit that usually worked with all of us, and she would be left alone.

There were times that she came out of hiding & walked along the middle of the road which was not a problem until she was faced by an oncoming car, usually the sensible thing for her to do would have been to come to our side onto the pavement.

That would have been far to easy so she would stop, stare at the car, which generally would slow down & swerve to avoid her, which was the time for her to decide to move to the other side of the road & give the car a passing nasty spit as she went.

She never wanted picking up or fussing & the only time I saw her playful was one new year when she decided to play with some paper streamers she had found and I realised somewhere in there was a lovely playful cat, the saddest thing was we never saw that again.

Eventually she grew older & became ill, although she had become quite a character both at home and to the local neighbours, sadly she died, but we always talked about her chair and the pleasure she had given to us all, she is still missed

Oliver The Cat

I will never forget Oliver, one of the nicest cats I have ever met, who was a real bundle of fun but sadly had a short life



I will start at the beginning, a friend who rescued cats contacted us to say would we take a young male Burmese cat, that needed re homing because the owner had to choose between the cat and her soon to be married partner.

This was because the cat had a nasal condition that meant it frequently sneezed and when this happened the contents of his nose marked anything it hit. The owner had been back to the breeder but they accepted no responsibility for this.

The owner who loved the cat wanted him to go to a good home where he could continue to be spoilt as she always had.

We went and visited and straight away took to him, he was a beautiful brown colour, the owner seemed happy with what we said so sadly for her passed him his basket & all his favourite toys & saw us off with tears in her eyes.

We could not initially decide what to call him because we did not like the name he already had, but quickly found he was constantly eating, so inspiration struck & we called him Oliver “The Boy Who Wanted More”

Because our last cat had disappeared, we were very protective of Ollie as he became known & he was kept in the home, apart from when I took him out for a walk on a lead, now some may say they do not believe this but I have found oriental cats very like dogs, so he used to enjoy these times but we did attract a lot of attention from others.

When out unlike a dog he would insist on climbing onto walls and other objects to check them out. In the home he always liked to be where it was warm & often damaged his paws going on the hotplates, but his favourite spot was on top of the boiler where he would stay for hours.

One day we had been upstairs on a task & we had left some sausages under the grill, when we came down all but 2 had disappeared & we could not work out how or why, we later discovered when he did it again he was scooping them out & Katie our dog (who you will hear of again) was quite happy to eat the evidence before Ollie could get down.

The other interesting expensive habit that Ollie had was to suck woollen garments as a child does a soother, which gave him a lot of pleasure but caused a lot of upset when favourite cardigans & tops where rendered un wearable in his search for a fix.

Sadly we only had Ollie for a few months because one day he managed to get out, we searched the streets in vain, contacting all the rescue agencies, Police & refuse collectors, sadly we eventually received a phone call to say that he had been found run over a short distance away. We went and collected him and buried him in the back garden, he was sadly missed, but eventually replaced by Bonnie & Emma who I will tell you more of another day